Teaching a little boy

I remember hearing Dr. King’s “I Have a Dream” speech in kindergarten. Our teacher Mrs. Santos played it on a cassette tape. The sound was scratchy, the silences dominated by large crackles. But Dr. King’s voice rang out powerfully. “One day this nation will rise up…” I didn’t fully grasp the importance of his message, but I remember his words changing me. They made plain a universal truth.

All these years later, it seems we need to revisit that ad-libbed speech. For instance, using the term “brothers and sisters” has fallen out of fashion. I wonder if it’s because we’re so far removed from viewing ourselves that way. But that’s what we are. America is a nation of brotherhood and sisterhood. It is a community. We’re so divided politically now, most of the time it doesn’t feel like one society.

But Dr. King reminds us to view and judge each other by the content of our character. And I believe in my heart that most Americans are of sound character. Most people are good. Most people just want to make a living and raise their families and feel love and connection and purpose. We all want those things.

I urge you to read Martin Luther King Jr.’s speech today. It will take you five minutes. It moved me to tears.

Bank holidays are often seen as simply a day off. That they are, and god knows they’re needed. But we should also remember their true purpose. MLK Day is a reminder, an opportunity for us to reassess how we see each other and ourselves. For our nation to question if we are living up to our promises. For “all flesh to see it together,” that we are one.

Thank you Dr. King, for teaching me as a young boy, and for inspiring so many others to embrace our collective humanity. Let freedom ring.

2025 Reflection

It’s really easy to slip out of the habit of anything, but particularly writing. I’ve felt too busy in watching my daughter every day, and too tired at night. These were excuses and rationalizations I told myself. Writing takes daily practice, and it’s also a vehicle for thinking. When I stopped writing regularly I stopped thinking deeply as often, which affected my ability to write about interesting things. I will renew my commitment to that in 2026.

Anything difficult or worthwhile takes time and repetition. The world’s greatest anything, be it golfer, podcaster, musician, etc. has mastered their domain because they’ve spent a lot of time practicing rep after rep. There are no cheatcodes or shortcuts. The only way to get good (and reap rewards such as social status, respect, income, freedom, etc.) is to do it, over and over again. This requires a longterm view: I will be good at this in 8 or 10 years. It requires discipline. And it is often incredibly mundane. Focus is one of the most valuable skills today, especially with the increasing infringement of technology into every waking moment. Our experience is determined by where we consistently direct our attention. Consistency is boring and tedious and unsexy, but it is what produces results. I want to be more consistent in 2026.

Most people are bad about wishing their family and friends happy birthday. It’s unfortunate because it’s really not difficult: put the person’s birthday in your phone’s contact, and it will remind you to text them on that day. There’s also a secret: it feels just as good to you when you wish them happy birthday. It enables you to reflect on your relationship with that person and appreciate them for who they are. You also get to be genuinely nice and thoughtful toward someone you love in an easy, quick and simple way.

I know my tribe. It consists of the people I sing about when I’m putting my baby to sleep. Baby Charlotte, baby Charlotte, time to sleep, time to sleep… Mommy always loves you, Daddy always loves you, pretty girl, pretty girl. There are 12 people and 2 pets I regularly mention. It’s not a foolproof method for understanding your most important people, but I’ve found it to be a good proxy.

I finally started doing Homework for Life toward the end of this year. I’m not sure it helps me remember everything better, as Matthew Dicks claims, but it definitely helps me appreciate the “ordinary” (actually the special) of each day. And it’s been very rewarding to strengthen my gratitude and appreciation for this wonderful thing we call life.

My life forever changed this year in early February when my daughter was born. I have crossed through a one-way door. I knew it would be impossible for my previous self to understand my current condition, but it hasn’t made the experience any less surreal. Having children is a transformation. It might be the most profound life experience one can have. I truly consider myself the luckiest person in the world for having my beautiful baby girl in my life. Thank you for being you Charlotte.

How has my life changed since having a baby? The house looks completely different (and a lot messier). I have apps on my phone I never knew about (1000 Books, Pathways.org, Baby Tracker, Owlet Dream). I prioritize sleep more than almost anything else. Working out has become a way to stave off dad bod, not a way to look good in a bathing suit. Coffee (cappuccinos!) has become an essential part of every morning. I regularly reflect on the meaning behind Disney song lyrics. The Laurie Berkner Band is a top listen on my Spotify. I call my parents Mimi and Papa instead of Mom and Dad. The list goes on, and I’m thankful for all of it.

I listen to a lot of podcasts that discuss purpose. I think it’s up to each of us to define our own. But I’ve found this year that one’s purpose can evolve, and that it doesn’t need to be complicated. With the advent of AI and the uncertainty in geopolitics and the economy, it’s easy to get caught up in societal success. Tribe matters. Purpose matters, and it’s yours to create, even if simple. Maximizing the love and time I have with my tribe has become my purpose.

Because most of all, I’ve realized that love is the answer. Love is what life is about, and we can always choose love. In a world getting increasingly darker and scarier, we can choose love over hate or indifference. We can love with everything we are, all we hope for, and all that ever will be. I choose love, in 2026 and beyond.

Most Important People

The one who birthed me, the one I’ve committed my soul to, and the one that came from me. The three most important people in my life. There are many others, but these three are the center of my being. I’ve known this ever since my baby was born, but today I wondered… is this typical for most people? What about throughout human history? Perhaps people anchor their lives around other types of relationships, like best friend, grandparent, chieftain or pastor? Are these relationship trends influenced by culture or age?

Questions like these are seemingly unknowable. But they’re worthwhile. And of course, kinship structures and primary social bonds have been studied in depth, by social scientists, anthropologists, evolutionary psychologists. Many scholars (but by no means a consensus) would probably agree “the most important people in your life” is a phenomenon we share across time, space, and culture. If a 7th century muslim in Medina and a 17th century Puritan in New England both treasure the same bonds, doesn’t that tell us something about our species? When medieval Chinese poets and modern Kenyan herders both revere their mothers, fathers, spouses, and children, it reveals a deep truth: our loyalties across history have remained the same.

Billions of people across the Earth have shared the same important relationships. It is yet one more piece of evidence that we are all one group, that we are diverse yet more similar than we are different, and that our sharing of the same wondrous planet makes us not just cohabitants but compatriots: humans who cherish the same loved ones in our hearts. Can we leverage this basic truth to develop one collective planet-wide consciousness?

The Future of TAV is Love

A malaise subdues us. Our world feels fatally flawed, weighed down with negativity. You can see it in the fabric of our collective consciousness, on your neighbor’s face when they bring up current events. The future feels like fear.

And yet, as I reflect on 6 years of blogging about the beauty of our world, I feel confident in rejecting the negativity. The fate of the world is not determined. It is open to whatever we make of it, and I truly believe in a positive, prosperous future for all life on Earth.

Besides, the world has always been ending. Every generation laments perceived recent and impending failure. The only difference today is our constant psychological bombardment, technology’s ubiquitous infiltration into our every waking moment. But we can still reject today’s dystopian worldview.

It starts with technology, and it’s incredibly simple (but not easy). We ‘just’ have to put down our phones. Remember that 2010 phone commercial? It’s now normalized reality. Being present has become impossible because we’re incessantly plugged into our devices. We need to unplug for our collective sanity.

I’ve focused on this recently when taking care of my daughter. It’s too easy to scroll through social media while sitting with her on the play mat. But when I put the phone away and simply sit with her, I feel meaning. Watching and playing with her brings joy. I can feel us bonding, feel her learning and growing. These are the favorite moments of my day. Thank you Charlotte, for helping me rediscover the smallest, most beautiful moments of this life.

It ends with love. When we live with love, when we really focus on feeling and delivering it as much as possible every day, we see possibility before us. Saying “I love you” more, to more people. Feeling gratitude for the priceless time spent with loved ones. I think about how many times I tell my wife and daughter I love them each day. I can always say it more. We feel it more when we say it. And feeling more love only breeds positivity and meaning. 

If more people put down their phones and focused on living with more love, our zeitgeist would change. It wouldn’t be negative. It would center around the possible and the beautiful. Because this really is a big beautiful amazing world. We can collectively recognize and actualize it together. It’s what I hope to continue doing with TAV for another year. Love to you all.

Family Trees and TAV

I’m rereading The Lord of the Rings by J.R.R. Tolkien, and the appendices at the end of the book are making me think about my place in life. I’ve realized I’m essentially just one point on the family tree, like one of the peculiar names within the genealogical trees in Appendix C, “Bungo” or “Bingo” or “Gruffo.” We’re so self-centered about our own life experience, we tend to think we’re Bilbo or Frodo in the grand story of our time. But most of us are 'just’ Bingo, and that’s okay. Besides, is it so bad to be Bingo? To have a beautiful baby daughter, to raise her (and maybe more children), and live out my days with my beautiful wife and the rest of my family? Is that so utterly horrible? I would hope that at my end, I would look back on such a life with fulfillment and satisfaction. 

But there’s something that pulls at me still. Some sense of contribution. I feel I should contribute to this world, to make it better, to leave it better than upon my entering it. I’m not sure why this pressure lingers over my head, perhaps it was how I grew up. But it’s why TAV exists. It’s my unique attempt to produce something that matters, to contribute to the human story, to the journey of Earth in time and space. I want people to appreciate the Earth’s beauty through my photography. I want to inspire people through my writing. I want to unite people despite their differences through my podcast. And I want to serve others through my consulting. This is the way I know how to give back.

And I think it’s okay for that gift to be relatively small—to otherwise live out Bungo’s path in raising a family and enjoying one’s time with their tribe. If we all chose such a course, there would be a lot less shadow in the world. If we could give up greed for the hero’s journey, we might make that path accessible for those who it’s destined. It might enable such a worldwide fairytale of the Shire, as Tolkien so vividly described. It really is up to us to create Earth’s legendarium. 

Charlotte's WebLetter: Love You Forever

I haven’t read you Love You Forever by Robert Munsch without crying yet. I read it to you this morning, as I do most days, and it was extra special—your great grandpa turned 90 years old today! You got to FaceTime with him, and both he and your great grandma were so happy to see you. 

I feel so lucky to connect this circle.

The world can be perilous little one. Right now it feels dark. But it doesn’t have to be. We create our own weather. We always have the choice to choose love. Optimism is a choice, not a condition. 

So when you see bad things online, and feel the larger system isn’t working to your benefit, you arrive at the crossroads. You get to choose where you take your next step. 

And remember this: the path of despair is exactly that. Hopelessness doesn’t feel good. Choose the path that’s more invigorating, even if it requires fighting. The path of hope and love is the better way, even if it’s sometimes the more difficult way.

The people in your life will make it easier. Surround yourself with those you love, those who will support you and defend you and raise you up. Your Mom and I will always be such people.

I often wonder if I’ll look back on 2025, years from now, hardly believing you came to us in such wild times. As my hope falters, I remember the best thing that’s ever happened to me has also occurred this year. For you I will continue to hope and love and fight.  It may be pure biology but it matters not. I fight on.

Find your light baby girl. And pass it on to those after.

Charlotte's WebLetter

I’ve been singing a lot of Disney songs to my daughter recently, and it’s choked me up a few times.

Behold:

“From the day we arrive on the planet… There's more to see than can ever be seen… More to do than can ever be done… More to find than can ever be found…”

- “Circle of Life” in The Lion King, written by Elton John, Hans Zimmer, Lebohang Morake, Tim Rice

“I don’t care what they’re going to say… And the fears that once controlled me can’t get to me at all… It’s time to see what I can do… I’m free… I am one with the wind and sky… I’m never going back, the past is in the past…That perfect girl is gone…”

- “Let it Go” in Frozen, written by Kristen Anderson-Lopez, Robert Lopez

“Unbelievable sights, Indescribable feeling… A hundred thousand things to see… With horizons to pursue…”

- “A Whole New World” in Aladdin, written by Alan Menken, Tim Rice

“Barely even friends… Then somebody bends… Unexpectedly… Both a little scared… Neither one prepared… Bittersweet and strange… Finding you can change… Learning you were wrong…”

- “Beauty and the Beast” in Beauty and the Beast, written by Alan Menken, Howard Ashman

“But if you walk the footsteps of a stranger… You'll learn things you never knew you never knew… And we are all connected to each other… For whether we are white or copper-skinned… We need to sing with all the voices of the mountains… We need to paint with all the colors of the wind…”

- “Colors of the Wind” in Pocahontas, written by Stephen Schwartz, Alan Menken

“You may think a sweep's on the bottom-most rung… Though I spends me time in the ashes and smoke… In this ol' wide world, there's no 'appier bloke… A sweep is as lucky as lucky can be… Good luck will rub off when I shakes 'ands with you…”

- “Chim Chim Cher-ee” in Mary Poppins, written by Richard M. Sherman, Robert B. Sherman

“Birds don't just fly, they fall down and get up… Nobody learns without getting it wrong… I won't give up, no, I won't give in… Till I reach the end and then I'll start again… I wanna try even though I could fail… Look how far you've come, you filled your heart with love… I'll keep on making those new mistakes… I'll keep on making them every day…”

- “Try Everything” in Zootopia, written by Mikkel Storleer Eriksen, Sia Furler, Tor Erik Hermansen

“My arms will hold you, keep you safe and warm… This bond between us can't be broken… I will be here, don't you cry… From this day on, now and forevermore… You'll be here in my heart always… When destiny calls you… You must be strong… Always, I'll be with you… Always and always…”

- “You’ll Be In My Heart” in Tarzan, written by Phil Collins

Charlotte, I hope you consider these lyrics when deciding how you want to live your life.

This universe is a glorious mystery we’ll never fully understand, but we can appreciate and surrender to its magnificence.

It doesn’t matter what others think of you, be who you are and be free.

The world is a wonderland to explore and experience—go see it.

Relationships can be scary or hard sometimes, but you can always choose to love. Life is better with love.

All people on this planet are equal, and you’ll learn from those who are different. Contribute to the beautiful human mosaic.

You choose and make your own happiness, regardless of life’s circumstances. Be happy simply because you can.

Failure is nothing to fear because failure is learning. You’ll live a richer life if you try new things.

I will always be here for you, as long as I’m living and beyond. I love you.

Cowboy Inspiration

I went to the Stern Grove Festival with my family yesterday to see Orville Peck. Just like the first time I saw him live, I felt moved, liberated from society’s shackle-hold, and hope. Both times I’ve watched him perform I was left in awe at his power throughout the full range of his voice.

His songs are deeply emotional, often working through personal or relationship conflict. It’s clear he’s experienced internal storms, and his singing about it, his proclaiming of an imperfect existence in this world… well I guess you have to see it to understand. 

Reflecting on his advocacy for the gay community on the drive home yesterday, I said to my wife, “it’s really fucked up how poorly the LGBTQ community is treated.” Orville Peck’s raw lyrics, infused with that cowboy mysticism, shed light on their plight through poetry. It resonates deeply with me as a straight white man.

I try to do good in the world. My ‘new year’s resolution’ for my birthday this year is to live with consideration every single day. And I’m trying to impact the world positively through TAV. I’m inspired by Orville Peck’s art and its impact on our planet. Thank you, Daniel, for simply being vulnerable. You inspire so many, and the world is better for it. 

The 4th of 2025

Tough this year. Kind of the definition of ambivalent.

I’m proud, in many ways, to be American. But today I am also ashamed, disheartened… and scared.

It’s not meant to be hyperbole. At this very moment, there are (for lack of a better term… how do we even label?) secret police rounding up people in the streets. Congress, the (supposedly) most powerful group of people in the country, has just passed legislation that a vast majority of Americans are against.

But today we’re celebrating democracy right? An indignation against solitary rule, a denouncement against despots with unilateral control. 

Here’s what I’m proud of: in my experience in this country, most Americans are genuine, kind-hearted people. Most uphold righteous values of freedom, self-belief, and friendship. It’s not hard to make friends in this country, whether the big cities or the remote countryside.

I’m proud to be American because I believe most Americans are good genuine people. Americans have passed on a tradition of goodness and greatness through the generations.

Not to say every American that’s ever been is enlightened. We currently have racists and fascists and those who wish to burn the world down among us. And our history can never be erased or commuted, a history rampant with hatred and indifference.

But I like to believe that most of the 330 million of us are not a part of that. That the goodness, the good things, have transcended any evil inherited from the past.

I believe most present-day Americans are good people. They want to contribute to a better America and a better wold.

But that’s a call to action. It’s time for Americans to act, to decry the greed and callousness infested in our government. It’s time for true patriotism. It’s time for us to rise together and craft one big beautiful amazing country.

One country, for all of us. Despite and due to its vastness and diversity. With and for all its beauty. 

I pledge my allegiance to the dream of America. So far we have not lived up to the dream. There are nightmares in our wake and the present. Can we start now?

Grand Education

Two days later and I might be only amazed with my daughter.

Hard to believe after witnessing the stunning scenery of Grand Teton National Park.

But it doesn’t compare. I’ve wondered, on this trip, if we’re setting up our 18 week old for bemusement: is the Earth always this volcanic, this dramatic, and full of such strange creatures?

No, I told her tonight at dusk, as the wind rolled through violently and quickly as we watched the trees blow. Pacha Mama gives us more than this. We walk this planet of wonder with privilege. She gives us everything, and it’s best for us to be appreciative.

On this trip, in one of America’s wildest, most surreal places, my daughter is gaining an education.

It is one I’m still receiving, one our species needs to keep seeking. We are a part, one small part, of this glorious planet ecosystem.

Grand Teton will show that to you.

Magnificent Yellowstone

I feel far removed from the fervor of Friday, and I see that as a good thing. Despite the crowds, of which I contribute to, I feel immersed in a foreign land.

I’ve joked to our family that our daughter will have a completely warped sense of the Earth. No dear child, most of the planet’s surface is not covered in volcanic activity, with bison and elk and bears roaming around. This is a special place indeed.

It’s felt so special that I’ve been reluctant to try to capture and summarize my sensations throughout each day here. Simply put, there’s nowhere else on Earth like it.

If we can give in to the natural beauty afforded to us on this planet, if we can let go and see just a little bit further to the horizon… There are no naysayers here, at the pinnacle of national parks, some of the last protected spaces. Tourists and sunscreen diehards like myself can’t preclude any other reaction but awe.

A Wild World

Yellowstone was the world’s first national park, opening in 1872. You can see why this is the place that started it all.

I often felt on another planet today. The geothermal activity, and all its visible features, makes one feel as though they’re embarking on a Martian journey. The color of the springs is spellbinding. You look out into the distance and see jets of steam everywhere, or if the timing is right, huge spouts of sporadic hot water.

There have been two bison hanging around the Old Faithful Inn the past two days. One has ironically posted up near the “DANGER WILDLIFE” sign, the other in the center of the main meadow right out front. These enormous animals have served as poster guides for all the tourists visiting.

There’s a lot of car time in the National Parks. I love looking out the window searching for wildlife, appreciating the beauty of the trees, streams and grasslands. The meandering rivers are absolutely picturesque, the epitome of America’s beauty and a far cry from the Martian landscape of Upper Geyser Basin. Even modern humans are drawn to the vistas, the open space, and the wildness of it all.

My daughter is too young to understand it, but I’m glad we’re showing her this magnificent place. I hope it will build a lifelong fascination with nature, the most powerful aspect of our planet. We are one with it, all the time. Even amongst the crowds of the national parks.

First Father’s Day

I kinda felt like Dorothy on Father’s Day.

We’re not in Kansas anymore Toto.

Many friends texted me for the specialness of the day, and I wasn’t expecting any of it.

We rode up and down a small plane to big sky country in Wyoming, and it was new for all of us as a family.

I felt proud to be American today. The national parks are beautiful, spectacular, and should be shared. Bison and bear and geyser today, all as a typical tourist, with little effort.

I want to contribute to a spur of effort for our wild places, for a recognized one world for all people, for a land with bison and bears.

Just like in the novel, we can land this cyclone. We can be free, and joyous and here.

We can be. If we recognize we’re not anywhere else.

Patriotic Euphoria

I upheld my duty as a father today. Coincidentally, I also feel I acted as a patriot.

“The liberties of our country, the freedom of our civil constitution, are worth defending against all hazards; And it is our duty to defend them against all attacks.”

— Samuel Adams

I was honored to attend the No Kings protest with my father-in-law

I was never up on the No Kings protest until the past 48 hours or so. In my local neighborhood, the protest lined 7 miles of El Camino Real, from Palo Alto to Sunnyvale. 

I was impressed and proud of the turnout, of the spirit of my fellow citizens. People of all creeds proclaimed their anger and dissatisfaction with the government. 

This is our right, this is our duty.

After a day of civic duty, it’s easy to retreat into comfort and reticence. That is not the path to change. We own this moment, as a people, standing as one, to demand a better country, a better democracy, and a better world. Keep fighting for One World.

Organize. Take Action. For Country and Children.

I’ve been arrested before. It’s scary and humiliating. I know what it feels like.

What’s happening in Los Angeles is not that.

When you’re arrested, you are detained by a uniformed police officer with a badge (and hopefully a body-worn camera). You are informed of the charges against you and the reason for being detained. Your rights are read to you. You are asked several questions upon being detained, which are used for the paperwork documenting the scene/circumstances and your arrest. The police officer notifies the police force that (s)he’s “bringing you in.”

Upon arrival, your identity is confirmed, your picture taken, and more paperwork is filed. This paper trail is public access. It’s all very official, and in many ways tedious and mundane.

In Los Angeles, masked, unidentified men are detaining Americans. ICE personnel are not identifying themselves or answering questions. They appear to completely disregard procedure. People are literally being grabbed, handcuffed, forced into vehicles, and driven off to unknown locations. There are multiple videos taken by bystanders showing this. Current reporting like this has confirmed detainees face grim, inhumane conditions at holding facilities: a lack of food, water, sanitation and light.

I do not wish to fear monger.

But this is the antithesis of due process, a right guaranteed to all people, not just citizens. It is a violation of the U.S Constitution, specifically the Fourth and Fifth Amendments.

If we are to protect our Union, for all its flaws, we must do so now. I urge you to find the upcoming protests scheduled in your area and show yourself, to demand a change in policy and to proclaim your rights and the rights of all who live in this country.

Tomorrow I go to protest the actions of my government. I believe it is my duty as an American and as a father. I do not want my daughter to grow up in this country as it exists today.

To raise global consciousness, to unite humanity, and to inspire change… requires action. I will not stand by and do nothing.

Another World

The problem with ignoring the news: I don’t know all the facts about Los Angeles. But as I’ve ‘caught up’ a little bit over the past few days, I’ve noticed that there are very little facts; it’s mostly rhetoric.

I browsed some Reddit threads in the L.A. and relevant subs. Most of the comments are anecdotal.

I read a few articles in yesterday’s San Jose Mercury News (the delivery man will toss another paper up the stairs if they miss my neighbor’s door). There were figures regarding the troop deployments and statements from both sides about the ongoing legal proceedings—a little better. But by the time I read through the paper, that information was undoubtedly outdated, as this situation is escalating and changing rapidly.

I watched Gavin Newsom’s “major address to Californians” and found it to be mostly theater. He made a good point about the lack of due process with masked men disappearing people in the streets, but I was otherwise left wanting for more facts. What were the casualties and damages in L.A. from the initial protests, before the National Guard was deployed by Trump? What have the casualties and damages been since? Providing these simple details would validate his claims that the situation was “under control.”

I believe the protest and unrest in L.A. were mostly peaceful, that there was little violence or property damage. But how can I be sure?

Our national conversation around these events prove it’s difficult to know the truth, even if one follows the news. In today’s world, virality is the only thing that matters. It’s how our news creates revenue. Thus overreaction is the intended effect. Get on a team and root for your side while disparaging the opposite’s position.

All the while, these events have significant consequences and scary implications for the rule of law and former precedence.

It's alarming and disheartening. My only solace is the sentiment I have strived to maintain through the past decade or so, one that was encapsulated perfectly in a window I passed by on a walk last week: “another world is possible.”

As of this moment, Americans have the right, and the power, to choose the direction and path of our country. Every human alive has the capability to contribute to another world. A better world. Can we organize and rise up as one? For our shared values of love, health and freedom?

We won’t find inspiration from the news. It must come from ourselves. I pray it does. And I still believe.

A Dash of Salt

“Take this with a grain of salt.” It’s something I’ve eternally struggled with: how do you know which inputs to accept, and which to guard against?

Alex Hormozi offers 2 criteria:

1. Is this person aligned with me? Are they incentivized for me to be successful?

2. Does this person have domain-sufficient competence or expertise?

That’s all well and good when it comes to feedback in sports or business. But what about in life, in the philosophy of life? Maybe the point is you must be specific—you can’t simply contemplate reality in generalizations.

If seeking life advice, you can probably vet the adviser using the above criteria. Is it someone that genuinely hopes you live well? Do they seem to be enjoying a happy, fulfilling life themselves (even if it’s not the exact life you want)? A ‘yes’ to both those questions means less salt.

And then there’s intuition, which I still highly value. Maybe one day we’ll better understand it scientifically. The way I think of it now: we exist within this particle soup we call the universe, and are somehow connected to all of it. We are a part of it. We are it, and intuition is the feeling of our connection. l find it powerful, useful, and trustworthy. When you’re present and in a clear state, intuition is rarely wrong. If the criteria above fails, it’s safe to lean into intuition.

Without stress--that’s the final part. All the paths before us are merely options, and it’s fully within our power, and purpose, to choose. We may live with as much or as little salt as we like.

Thoughts from Truckee

We made great time, barely hitting any traffic. It felt a little foreboding to be honest, to miss so much of the crowds on a holiday weekend. One of the new rules is babies aren’t supposed to be in their car seat for more than 2 hours. So we stopped just outside Sacramento. The gas station was right off the freeway, and full of… colorful characters. I told my wife to lock the car while she nursed and I went to use the restroom, which the attendant had to buzz me in to use. Once we set off again, our baby girl definitely gave us the look of “really, you’re still keeping me in this thing?” We didn’t have to stop after that, arriving in Truckee, and the cabin, before sundown.

The cabin… it was surreal driving on 80 as we neared Truckee. I remembered various spots on the road, the lonely gas station, where Boreal was, the commercial train across the valley. I watched those things as we passed them by as a kid, riding in the back seat with my aunt and uncle. They were gracious enough to take me up to Tahoe often when I was growing up, both in the winter and in the summer. I made the familiar turn off the highway and headed up to their Tahoe Donner neighborhood. The turns came naturally, as if I could feel my way in return. We arrived. When I first saw it, I was hit with a wave of nostalgia. This cabin was a place of adventure for me as a youth, a place in which I felt comfortable and cared for, but still somewhere foreign, where I learned about harsh winters and the snow, life at elevation, and so much more.

I gained a lot of independence here. My aunt taught me to swim in the pool at my house, but she would take me to the community Northwoods Pool, and I was “off on my own,” with no friends but free to explore. I learned archery here in the summers, and did rock climbing trips with the local kids. And in the winter I learned how to snowboard, that surreal sensation of floating down the mountain on fresh powder. In many ways, it was here that I grew up and became independent, separate from my parents.

I unlocked the front door and faced the familiar mud room - it was here that I first learned what a ‘mud room’ was. The familiar dining table was just beyond, where I had many coming of age conversations with my uncle. I turned to the left to find a completely redone kitchen and living room. The cabinets and counters were brand new, and the sunken floor of the living room was gone, leveled off to the sliding glass door and large windows. It felt familiar yet strange.

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Admiring the scenery at Donner Lake

People were very friendly, but I’m pretty sure most side-eyed us as I pushed the bassinet stroller along the trail. I guess no one takes little babies on hikes through the forest. 

But it was blissful. The excessive bumps and jiggles of the trail rocked our baby girl to sleep, and pushing the stroller gave me a better workout. I remember looking up and seeing the trail wind ahead, silhouetted by towering trees all around us… the snow dripped mountains resolute in the distance, with nothing but us and the sounds of the forest. 

We love nature. We belong in nature. Visiting Truckee has brought us to it again.

We’ve also been doing a digital detox while up at the cabin. We haven’t turned on the TV at all, and we’re staying off ‘the algorithmic internet,’ as Cal Newport calls it. For me, that means no Reddit, no ESPN, no social media. Resorting back to using our phones for only 5 things: calls, texts, photos, maps, and music.

I found this “cabin chill” playlist on Spotify and it’s been so relaxing and fitting. Soft slow sounds that seem to soak up the wooden walls and wooden beams high up on the ceiling. It helps fully transport us to this cabin retreat.

The cabin creaks and settles. It’s a different type of building, a different experience staying here. These little differences would be unnoticeable if we were plugged in.

I sat out on the deck with my baby girl near dusk while Mommy took a shower. It was incredibly peaceful to sit there with my daughter, listening to the sounds of the forest. She is fascinated by trees. I counted over 50 with her, just within our immediate field of view. We heard the birds and the squirrels, felt the wind gently pass through our glade. I felt the forest then, even the bears and the deer and the coyotes and cats, all the birds and owls and squirrels… you just know when you’re in a forest. It feels… enclosed and sheltered, but vast… immersive but connective. How wonderful we enjoy a world with forests.

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Downtown Truckee on a beautiful May day

Happy Chill Morning mix for Spotify to start the day. I got to spend time with baby girl while we let Mommy sleep some more. Just us on Great Grandma’s quilt with the woods outside. It’s amazing how much she’s learned in 15 weeks. She now plays, with toys, with you. I love playing with her. 

Diced tomatoes and spinach and cheese in scrambled eggs over toast for breakfast, along with our trusty French Press once again. I guess we’re those kind of people now, bringing our fresh coffee beans and grinder and French press. Simple hearty breakfast with fresh hot coffee, just the three of us isolated in our mountain cabin. I want for nothing more.

I heard my daughter’s first laugh today. I was walking up the stairs, bringing diaper cream to Mommy who was changing her, when she started. Hastening up the final steps, I hurried to the edge of the bed where she was being changed, just giggling away at the wind from the open window blowing on her bare bottom. It lasted all of 15 seconds, and I cried. We shared the joyous moment together, just the three of us. I didn’t have my phone to take a picture or video, and I didn’t need it. It was a private moment just for us.

We did our first walk with baby girl facing outward in the carrier. It was just behind the cabin, in the trailway between the open backyards. I’d say maybe 25 minutes, a half a mile. But she liked it, and that was the measure of success. In a way I felt more a Dad than ever, shielding her face from the sun (hats are still strictly off limits for miss high maintenance), walking carefully over the trail, one hand under her bottom, one across her chest. It was a walk in the woods with a new family, and in some mystical sense, I felt it was a rite of passage. A modern generation living a life of convenience, but walking amongst the trees with baby in tow, like so many thousands of generations before…

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Looking back at the ponds from Cold Stream Drive

She’s started to give us this look when we put her in the carseat, like “where now?” So much adventure for a new family of three over the past few days. Adventure for all of us, Mom and Dad trying to learn how to do all of it all over again with a baby now, and for baby girl herself, her first time for so many things… her first road trip, first bumpy rumbly hike, her first outward-facing walk in the woods, her first stay away from home… her first time at elevation, first time in a forest with the breeze ruffling her hair and sweet baby skin. First time in a foreign place for multiple days… “we’re still here?!” 

It’s been adaptation for all of us. Particularly baby girl, who we couldn’t have asked more from. But also for us, learning that she’s okay, that she can handle change and variation and less than ideal conditions. 

It’s also been listening to perfectly timed playlists, looking out the windows to the forest beyond, just soaking in the essence of the cabin. Up in the mountains, you don’t need TV or internet.  You need your connection to your tribe, which we’ve maintained these past few days, but there’s something about the reclusive lounging, the disappearing far away high up in the mountains, that’s suited us. It may be gone tomorrow, once we enter the hustle and bustle of the Bay Area. But that doesn’t mean there wasn’t something to learn up here, just the three of us, “hiding” away, learning and growing together as a family.

This was special. It’s been a reconnection to nature, to our roots of humanity, but also a journey. There’s only more learning ahead, based on all the learning that’s happened rapid-fire so far.

Truckee is beautiful. California is awesome—don’t let the media or Texans or anyone else tell you different. It’s amazing we have these mountains and lakes high up on the border, just here to enjoy and bask in their pristine glory. Keep Tahoe blue for sure. Visit nature. Explore. This is what makes us human, even with a baby in tow. Thank you Tahoe, thank you pacha mama, and thank you God, the universe, whatever we call this miracule we get to enjoy and explore.

Finding the Signal

Well the Golden State Warriors' season is over. I guess I'll have to find something else to do every other night. Replace it with reading? Because we don't want our daughter to be exposed to screens before two years old, we've been watching a lot less TV, and it's felt great. Trying to raise our child 'the right way' is also ensuring we are indeed living the right way.

I've also become much more selective with the podcasts I download. My queue is down to one last health episode, and I will heavily scrutinize any future episodes published by my subscribed shows.

Most of it is noise. I want to prioritize 'need to know' and 'just in time' information, as pertinent to my life circumstances. Most of my consumption is entertainment to stave off boredom.

When we escape that urge for dopamine release, we wake up and smell the flowers, sometimes literally. I still enjoy the sounds of nature amidst the early morning quiet on my balcony each day. The slower, simpler, deeper life isn't invigorating, but it's rewarding. It's peaceful. And it enables me to more conscientiously choose what to prioritize, how to spend my time.

It's clear, in this mode, that my family is most important to me right now, and always. I choose love, I choose time, and I choose health. And I believe we all consistently make that choice, once we cut down the noise.

When I'm Gone

I heard something recently about multigenerational goals… that if your goals can be accomplished within your lifetime they’re too small. It’s an interesting perspective.

I want TAV to be here when I’m gone. I want someone after me to showcase the wonder of our one world. I want the mission of raising global consciousness, uniting humanity, and inspiring change to continue.

I believe anyone and everyone on the planet can buy in to this mission. Because the Earth, and humanity, and the glory of the universe is worth dedicating generations toward. The wonder is utterly beautiful. I guess I just need to inspire someone to keep going.